Thursday, February 10, 2011

Reality R Us

According That Grape Juice, Lady GaGa instructed Vogue magazine that she has " one of the greatest voices in the industry."

My, my, tuts the demure midwestern mild-mannered Matron. People from Minnesota are not supposed to toot their own horns.

Student to Matron: "You're the best teacher I've ever had!"

Horrified Matron: "NO I'M NOT!"

John to Matron: "You look stunning today."

Matron: "Stop messing with me."

Now, the Matronly circle of influence is relatively small. She's a medium-sized fish in a medium-sized town and at a medium-sized college. Her range is limited. Lady GaGa, however, has the hormones necessary to place herself at the forefront of an entire global industry.

My, my, tuts the Matron.

So in that spirit:

The Matron is one of the best (if barely known) writers in the blogosphere -- when it comes to sheer narrative and prose. There, she did it. Friends, she's shaking and sweating to find herself so out of character.

Did the earth move? If you see a few stars fall tonight or the sky crack open in a Biblical sense, it's her fault.

The Matron is the best cook in her house!

Okay, not true.

The Matron is a great traveler and is looking forward to her flight home from Chicago tomorrow!

Again, not true.

Let's stick with the good writing thing.

Friends: be bold!! What are you good at that you're proud of?


Anonymous said...

I'm actually a pretty good cook and baker ... my kids and co-workers think so anyway!

Common Household Mom said...

People tell me that I am a good listener. I don't know that I can say I'm proud of it, but I'm glad to use that skill to help people in need, when I can.

I am very good at spelling. When I was in 6th grade I came in 2nd in the Columbus, Mississippi Spelling Bee. I won a dictionary and a gallon of chocolate ice cream. The winner had to go on and compete in another spelling bee. I got the better end of the deal. Of course, spelling is of no use to anyone any more.

Other than that, I am a paragon of mediocrity.

You are a good writer. I enjoy your blog immensely. Thanks for writing it, amid all the other things you have to handle.

Minnesota Matron said...

Common Household Mom: if you're a good speller, you have me beat. I'm a spell check groupie : -).

Memarie Lane said...

I honestly have no idea how to answer that question. How sad is that? I can only think of things I COULD be good at. I guess I feel its safer to leave it at that, because if I actually try the stuff I may discover that I'm really terrible at it, and coulds are better than nothings.

trash said...

OK at? Lots of stuff. Really really good at? Little kids. And daily I miss hanging around with them. Damn life choices and consequences thereof. One day I shall return to Early Years' Education.

Karen (formerly kcinnova) said...

I'm good at playing Minesweeper and have the scores to prove it.
My husband assures me (and I believe it to be true) that I am very good at a certain something which cannot be shouted to the blogosphere. Much tutting going on now, even without naming it!

Anonymous said...

I agree that you are the best writer in the blogesphere!

Irene said...

I'm sure you don't really want me to brag about myself. I think it's best not done at all.

Laura said...

i can bake like nobody's business!

Anonymous said...

I am a great Mom for my particular daughter with her specific quirks and abilities.
I actually am a great writer in one specific sub-genre in the business/government/working world. I can synthesize big, messy and technical documents for the lazy (or lay) person.
I can make an acceptable dinner from what's in the cupboard with little or no notice. (Not sure if that makes me a good cook, or a better shopper.)
Am good at being flexible in accomodating/dealing with the spare teen or two that show up with no notice and expect to be fed, transported, etc. I actually like most of them.
I am a really good online shopper for things we need and the few luxuries we splurge on. (Got a great deal on a prom dress for May that would cost at least 50% more if we waited until then.)

Kimber said...

I'm really good at making (designing, sewing) children's clothes. But I'm with you on the shaking and sweating at the thought of selling what I make.

I'm a good reader, too, known for my particular excellence in choosing well-written blogs to follow.

Lisa B-K said...

I make awesome radio.

I'm pretty good at a few other things, too, but that's the one I'm most into right now.

Also? I can relate to the flying thing. I barely breathed through the 2.5 hour flight to Tampa yesterday. No Xanax.

Laurie said...

I am a good cook/baker. I also think I'm a pretty good decorator ( I seem to have an eye!), and I'm a great mother. At least that's what I tell my kids!

Ingrid said...

I have a great memory: for meaningless facts, funny stories, strange words and word jokes.
And I am really interested in other people.

Mrs. Matron - from the old continent I admire your writing skills. BUt just as much your sense of humor, your enormous amount of energy and that greatest gift of all: to be able to see the relativity of it all!

Anonymous said...

I am a trivia goddess. Never lost a game in my life, and qualified thrice to appear on Jeopardy although they haven't called me (yet). I'm a darned good knitter and getting better all the time, I write a decent sentence and paragraph, I am a good friend, and I am a damned good snuggler. My kids turned out great so I think that qualifies me as a good parent.

That's enough for one life.

Wenderina said...

Apparently I'm better at my job than I thought. Have had two headhunters call me this week telling me how "highly respected" I am. Who knew? Most of the time I feel like I'm barely getting by.

Daisy said...

That's why I come back! Your blog fascinates me largely because it's so well written.

I'm a good gardener, and I'm gradually taking that skill and turning it into preserving and cooking delicious organic foods for my family. I love Wisconsin in the winter, but I really look forward to spring!

historygirlie said...

I can make one he** of a cheesecake, and I can get just about any high school kid interested in American History!

(and now this mild Wisconsinite is going to crawl back into her polite little shell.....)

Minnesota Matron said...

Can I just say how amazing we all are?!! And what good blog taste is presented here as well : -).

Ulrike said...

I am an excellent procrastinator.

I can also draw okay and write amusing silly stories.

Both of those things make me happier than my admirable skill with the procrastination thing.

Anonymous said...

I am a great friend. I am also a good sitter; meaning one who sits (reading, playing solitaire, or reading blogs.)

You are a good writer. I like your blog, so I guess that makes me good at choosing good blogs :)

Suburban Correspondent said...

The Matron is one of the best (if barely known) writers in the blogosphere -- when it comes to sheer narrative and prose.

Yes, my dear, you are! That's why I always show up here. Sorry to have gone AWOL for a couple of weeks - I've been trying to get my life together. Oh, and the appliance shopping - that took a bunch of time, also.