Friday, March 6, 2009

The State of the Union

Are hospitals unable to afford heat? Because the Matron has never been in a hospital that didn't require an additonal layers of clothing. Immediately.

So she and John have been shivering for two days as they take their seperate shifts with Grandma Mary. The situation is serious and has potential to worsen. Or it could just get better. But she knows her mother wouldn't want Detail, Writ Large.

The following is representative of their 'quality time.' The Matron is barreling south on 35E toward the small town where she grew up and her mother still lives. John is speeding north on same freeway.

Intelligently, they risk leaving their three small children orphans by talking on their cell phones.

John: "Where are you?"

Matron: "Just passed Yankee Doodle Road."

John: "Oh! I'm at Pilot. Our paths will cross! We can see each other!"

Matron: "Omigod that is SO cool! Why am I so excited?"

John: "I'll see you because of the peace sign. There! I see the van! There! I'm waving!"

Matron: "I couldn't see you. But that was WAY cool."

John: "Did we just have sex?"

Matron: "Why don't you just say yes so things seem all rosy for the rest of the week?"

John: "Is there a hidden message in that sentence?"

Matron: "Hmmmmm. . . . "

Thanks in advance for all that love and light and friendship. She needs this crisis to be over. Soon.


Jenn @ Juggling Life said...

Maybe this joke a friend used to tell will give you a smile.

A group of long-married men were talking about sex. One man said, "My wife and I have hall sex all the time."
The second man looked interested, "Hall sex?"
"Yes, we pass in each other in hall and say, 'Fuck you!' to each other."

Good luck with all you're dealing with.

smalltownme said...

I'm glad you had a nice moment amongst all the trauma.

Becky said...

It sounds like the state of the union is strong!

I'm sending best wishes for peace and strength.

Mrs. G. said...

Thinking of you MM. Hang tough.

And that was totally sex.

Lynda said...

Drive-by sex. How "today." Thoughts and best wishes still being sent your way.

Mary Alice said...

After so many years and so many by sex can be quite nice...sometimes it's all you can get.

Balou said...

I'm going to put a peace sign on my van and have an affair. ;)

My thoughts are with Grandma Mary and all of you.

Michele R said...

They say the brain is the biggest sex organ. I am glad that you are driving distance from Grandma. I have issues going on with mine and my mom and they are a 10 hour drive, or a flight. Hang in there!

Heather said...

I wonder if my husband would buy that. Nah.

Positive thoughts heading your way.

Anonymous said...

John is so cute. ;-)

I tried telling mine the other day that when I fly over the house on Monday mornings, 'pretend I'm on top'.

He didn't buy it. ;-)

Good thoughts following both of you on your way.

Daisy said...

I hope all goes well for you, no matter what the outcome from Grandma.

MJ said...

Take care of yourself! (Especially considering those dangerous road encounters!) Hope your mother is feeling better soon!