1. Sunday is Easter (really, as a practicing Buddhist, she wasn't tracking).
2. Merrick -- awake late because Scarlett had a friend sleeping over and much jealousy ensued) informed his mother that the "bunny is coming."
3. Scarlett is still uncertain about the Easter Bunny's actual existence but is adamant that nobody can make up Santa (she's 11 and the Matron wonders if this is ethical).
4. He Who Cannot Be Named is confident that Scarlett is entirely lying about all in #3 and it just out for sympathy and presents.
5. John is done with his part of the family taxes and the Matron? Uh, where is that folder?
6. It is possible for a dog to produce its body weight in vomit.
7. Cucumbers left in the fridge for a month morph into a meaty liquid.
8. If you don't water the plant in your son's bedroom, it dies, and then you need to have that awful mortality conversation. Don't even get her going about "Dave," the fly.
9. Ringworm is tenacious and inventive. The horror surrounding this can't quite be articulated, especially because--in case you weren't reading closely -- this information was imparted between 10 and 11 pm. On multiple body parts.
10. EVERYBODY snores, including the visiting dog who produced her body weight in vomit.
Guess who went 'bunny' shopping today?