Matron: "I'm not sure that's negotiable. But let me just clarify. Is this a question about your interior life -- how you're feeling and what you're thinking -- or a question about what happened to you during the day, on the outside, like at school or with friends?"
HWCBN: "And that was your question for the day. May I just say you're not being very effective."
Dear God-Buddha-Oprah-Universe-Allah (and maybe Ellen), he's only fourteen. Please help her.