Friday, June 12, 2009

Let's See: Terminal Illness or Pregnancy?

The Matron just stumbled across a gem of an idea -- a white hot stroke of genius that might carry her through days like yesterday, wherein she of clogged nose and brick head, had not ONE SINGLE THING to say except:  "hand me a Kleenex" and "Stryker are you going to puke now?"

Why, days like that, she could completely lie!

This is not the stretch of the Achilles heel (to which the Matron is prone) or the wee waggle of hyperbole (guilty again!), but all out pure Fabrication.   Have you heard of April's Mom, the woman who faked a difficult pregnancy online only to drew MILLIONS of readers--some of whom sent her money, called her daily and organized prayer chains on behalf of her entirely fictive fetus?

Read about her here and here

Maybe the next time ideas elude or illness intervenes, and the Idea Well runs dry, the Matron will just invent . . . .wait! Who's that on the door step!?

Paternity raise thy unholy head!  Who knew John fathered conjoined twins, long held captive by their psychotic mother, who are now free and seeking sex reassignment surgery (like little Chastity) and in need of a place to stay while the hormones perculate!  

Just when she had nothing to say . . . . 


Jenn @ Juggling Life said...

Those poor twins--thank goodness you are such a warm and loving woman--you will be able to make such a difference in their lives.

Where should I send my check?

Cheri @ Blog This Mom! said...

Or you could tell everyone that you gave birth to the twins of a drag queen turned American Idol contestant turned hot new recording artist.

Either way.

Miss Grace said...

You haven't done it right until you've started asking for money.

SuburbanCorrespondent said...

I thought of Mrs. G when I read that news item about Chastity this morning.

Jillian said...

I saw one of her posts found in a link from one of the news websites. I still can't believe it.

What if ALL of our blogs were fakes????