Life in the Gourmet Lane

As typical for this 11 year old, tonight Scarlett is attending the theater --this time, with a friend. While it is hard to complain about Art, the Matron has seen more shows in the past four years than her entire life. Scarlett has a long expensive list of EVERYTHING PLAYING in town that she must see. Recently, the Matron had to cancel a couple and Scarlett spent 48 hours in her closet.

This frees up one brain lobe for the parents.

So they decided to take the boys to Black Dog Cafe (because they had a coupon).

Collision of vested interests! Merrick likes just two places to dine (and let's use that word loosely): Subway and Snuffy's. He is not yet scared to death of the industrial food chain, although his mother is working hard at that.

About 4:30, Merrick began a long, hard and calculated lobby for an escape to a friend's house, one of his best buddies and second future husband, J. It just so happens that J's parents founded and ran one of St. Paul's premo restaurants for 12 years.

Matron: "But Merrick! We're going out to eat. This is like a four times a year event. Don't you want to go with us?"

Merrick: "MOM! The food at Jack's house is AMAZING. I would rathew eat thewe than anywhewe in the wowld. It is WEALLY GOOD FOOD."

The Matron relented and J's family was more than happy to fold one more kid in for a meal, while He Who Cannot Be Named and the parents went out do dinner.

It was great! Everyone pretended the pulled pork in their sandwiches had long happy pre-processed lives.

They picked up Merrick on their way home.

Merrick: "How was the westwant Mama?" (isn't that thoughtful?)

Matron: "It was great! How was your dinner?"

Merrick: "I told you they have AMAZING food!"

Matron: "What did you have?"

Merrick: "Fwozen pizza!"

Pause

Merrick: "But it wasn't Cosco so it was pwobably GOUWMET fwozen pizza."