Friday, December 11, 2009

Thank The Internet

Indeed, the Matron extends a heartfelt (real!) thanks to all of her wonderful readers for the collective Good Will and Good Wishes!

Drum roll . . . . .

Yesterday's tenure review could NOT have gone better! She swears, she felt all that love bubbling up from behind her computer screen and carrying her throughout a day so busy that Grandma was enlisted to shuttle Scarlett.

Not only did the Matron spend the day sweating her employment (she's just nervous that way and has one more probationary year to go so don't stop believin'), she also toured two schools in anticipation of launching two children into two more schools next year. Junior and Senior High! Never mind Merrick, at his rate he'll be fifteen in first grade.

Two school tours, one performance review, one afternoon matinee for Scarlett, one late afternoon photo shoot across town, one evening performance and Parent Night at the elementary school! And the damn foster dog is PEEING IN THE HOUSE. He came from Tennessee and this week's zero degree temps with six inches of snow has peeled off that dog's mask and shown her Snappy's real stripes: he is a winter wuss!

Today? A small bobbing beacon of quiet and calm. The Matron was home, all alone! With broom and vacuum! She knows that others would be reading but she of Incurable Clutter Brain Suck was in desperate need of a fix and fix she did get. This house is gleaming. Her brain? Back on.

This weekend holds bright narrative promise! Picture the Matron and her husband at Cosco. No, they are not holiday browsing or gasping for joy over the price of bananas. In another attempt to prove her complete mental instability to her spouse, the Matron volunteered to purchase, pack and deliver 700 nutritious snacks for the upper division of Scarlett and Merrick's school to take with them on a five day camping trip at Wolf Ridge Environmental Learning Center.

!! Bad idea !!

Knee-deep in protein bar and graham cracker, the Matron must also prepare Scarlett for five days of camping: WINTER CAMPING. In Minnesota. Where it is not even zero degrees. Where there is six feet of snow threatening to kill you.

Anybody remember how well the little prisoner of war reacted to summer camp?

Let's just say things are very exciting around here. She doesn't know about your house, but this one includes fainting spells, dry heaves, stomach aches, aversion to food, red eyes, hair that won't dry completely even though it APPEARS DRY TO YOU MAMA, four loose teeth, a dry tongue, insomnia and a newly developed fear of sleep-walking that can only be soothed by staying awake all night, a convenient twist to the already existing insomnia.

The bus leaves Monday morning at 9 am. God help us, everyone.

10 comments:

Unknown said...

(the Other Mary's Tom here) -
Remember, our young girls is on that bus too, and we hope that all will hang together (and the weather will moderate).
Do tell your readers that this is not a Canvas Tent thing with Frozen Water Glasses in the morning; they will be in a Warm Dry Dorm - venturing out for horizon expanding experiences into that, yes, extremely cold Northern Minnesota Tundra. May not help Scarlett, but it eases our minds.

Anonymous said...

Heh. #1 son went to Wolf Ridge and loved it. I hope Scarlett stops dry heaving long enough to give the place a chance.

Inside the Philosophy Factory said...

Hey -- that cold neighborhood is where my mom lives :) -- most of the time... actually, she lives near the old ELC. When they built Wolf Ridge, they moved to a location that's a little bit warmer :).

She'll have fun. My sister went with the Girl Scouts to the old ELC, and I'm still friends with the folks she met there.

Daisy said...

I'll use my imagination and think about the possibility that Scarlett might enjoy winter camp more than summer camp because it's so different, so completely unique. Sending thoughts your way...from frozen tundra Wisconsin, in the neighborhood of Lambeau Tundra Field.

Karen said...

My son is on the waiting list for his school trip there after Christmas ... hopefully he will get to go, and hopefully Scarlett will love it.

Glad your review went well!!!

Jenn @ Juggling Life said...

Getting them off might be difficult, but then they'll be gone! Which is nice for a short time and then you'll wonder what on Earth to do with yourself.

~annie said...

Now I understand how people believed the Coen brothers' claim that "Fargo" was based on a true story - there's some serious brain freeze happening in yonder North...

jenn said...

You're a rock star! I don't know that I'd be any more keen on winter camping than Scarlett is, considering that I tend to get a wee bit whiny over camping in the best of conditions. It'll be character-building, right? That's what my husband always tries to tell me.

Anonymous said...

Oooh...Scarlett on a camping trip sounds like the best dramatic perfomrance of the YEAR! The foster dog? Needs to go along--tough love (haha).

JanuskieZ said...
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