Thursday, October 25, 2007

I Hate It When That Happens

Someone wrote the article I intended to. Go to salon.com, click on broadsheet (left hand side) and read the catchy title: "Is Thyroid Disease the New Hysteria?" Hey! Get your (more successful) hands off my idea!

For the record ---

Book I have yet to write: "Witty Replies and Quick Comebacks: The Pocket Guide for the Slow Thinker."

Commerce I have yet to exploit: Super-size geriatric supply store, a medical supply Wal-Mart stocking walkers, wheel-chairs and respirators as Boomers start the inevitable decline.

Further Commerce: Handy Man empire catering to the elderly called "The Son-in-Law Stand-In." We screw in light bulbs, mow the lawn, change fuses, repair door handles and putter generally, as needed.

Conceptual: The concept of 'self' as we have understood (and lived) it, is in the midst of profound and foundational change. We're talking Enlightenment quality here. Big guns!

That's it for now. Don't want to share all the goodies. And the answer is, yes, thyroid patients are today's hysterics. Weight gain, depression, acne, anxiety. It's all in her pretty little head. Hysterics suffered through the rest cure, we get to drink radioactive iodine and take carcinogenic medication. PTU is on the official Health and Human Services' list of carcinogens but it's the best medicine has to offer pregnant women.

Thyroid disease is largely a female malady. Funny how the main three treatment options haven't been tweaked much since 1950.

2 comments:

sh8un said...

I know I am supposed to be supportive, but I am so much better at giving you a swift kick in the ass, when you need it. You have been talking about writing the book "Witty Replies and Quick Comebacks: The Pocket Guide for the Slow Thinker." for almost as long as I've known you. Just by random occurrence, someone else is going to write that damn book if you wait long enough. So, write the book already.

Mary said...

I know, I know! The problem? I can't think of any quick comebacks or witty replies. I guess I possess more need for the book than skill to write. Speaking of which, off to teach writing!